DUMB AND DUMBER

Crystal-Harris-2

Crystal Harris, the dumb and dumber ex of playboy boss, Hugh Hefner, continues to make a fool of herself.  After dropping the pot of gold that sat at the end of the marriage rainbow, she’s trying to reinvent her lack-luster image by becoming a media whore. She went on the Howard Stern Show talking about Hef’s sex antics in the bedroom.

She basically called him a touch-and-go man, meaning as soon as he touched it, he was gone. Then she said unconvincingly that she was “not turned on by Hef, sorry”. Is that right princess sweetie? When did you figure this out?  After you said yes to the 80 year old mackman’s proposal? What were you thinking? Let me flex my psychic abilities for a moment:

The crystal ball, (pun intended), tells me that you thought a mix of super-strength Viagra and Snoop Dog’s branded Gin and Juice would make Hef the young pimp we all know and love.

Crystal might have figured if she could catch Hef slipping and get him to sign without a pre-nup she would hit the playboy lottery. But big boss Hef ain’t no fool. He’s been playing bimbos of Crystal’s IQ level for years. He went to his twitter page to clear the air. He said “Is she trying to impress a new boyfriend?

Game recognize game. Crystal claimed she loved Hef and the lifestyle. Duh? Tell us something we don’t know. Crystal is the perfect example of why sex-work should be left to sex workers. Any sex worker of just average intelligence and game could have greased Hef’s wheel not allowing them to squeak in order to reach their financial peek. Maybe Crystal really is the new Chrissy Snow, the dumb blonde from Three’s Company famed show.

Jewel of the Week; His name is Hef b-cuz his pockets are hefty. Money, power, respect- the key to life. The group The Lox been said that, proving rap music can teach. Sex workers rule-true that!

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